Hell: Warm Words on the Cheerful and Comforting Doctrine of Eternal Damnation — Inside the Classic
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Produced by David Widger
WARM WORDS ON THE CHEERFUL AND COMFORTING DOCTRINE OF ETERNAL DAMNATION
COL. INGERSOLL'S AMERICAN SECULAR LECTURES
By Col. Robert G. Ingersoll
Minister Of The Gospel Of Free Thought In America
Rev. HENRY WARD BEECHER says:--"I admire Ingersoll because he is not afraid to speak what he honestly thinks, and I am only sorry he does not think as I do. I never heard so much brilliancy and pith put into a two hours' Speech as I did on that night. I wish my whole Congregation had been there to hear it. I regard him as one of the greatest Men of the Age."--New York Herald.
THE idea of a hell was born of revenge and brutality on the one side, and cowardice on the other. In my judgment the American people are too brave, too charitable, too generous, too magnanimous, to believe in the infamous dogma of an eternal hell. I have no respect for any human being who believes in it. I have no respect for any man who preaches it. I have no respect for the man who will pollute the imagination of childhood with that infamous lie. I have no respect for the man who will add to the sorrows of this world with the frightful dogma. I have no respect for any man who endeavours to put that infinite cloud, that infinite shadow, over the heart of humanity.
For a good many years the learned intellects of Christendom have been examining into the religions of other countries in the world, the religions of the thousands that have passed away. They examined into the religions of Egypt, the religion of Greece, the religion of Rome and of the Scandinavian countries. In the presence of the ruins of those religions the learned men of Christendom insisted that those religions were baseless, that they were fraudulent. But they have all passed away. While this was being done the Christianity of our day applauded, and when the learned men got through with the religions of other countries they turned their attention to our religion. By the same mode of reasoning, by the same methods, by the same arguments that they used with the old religions, they were overturning the religion of our day. Why? Every religion in this world is the work of man. Every book has been written by man. Men existed before the books. If books had existed before man, I might admit there was such a thing as a sacred volume. Man never had an idea--man will never have an idea, except those supplied to him by his surroundings. Every idea in the world that man has came to him by nature. You can imagine an animal with the hoof of a bison, with the pouch of the kangaroo, with the wings of an eagle, with the beak of a bird, and with the tail of the lion; and yet every point of this monster you borrowed from nature. Every thing you can think of, every thing you can dream of, is borrowed from your surroundings. And there is nothing on this earth coming from any other sphere whatever. Man has produced every religion in the world. And why? Because each religion bodes forth the knowledge and the belief of the people at the time it was made, and in no book is there any knowledge found, except that of the people who wrote it. In no book is there found any knowledge, except that of the time in which it was written. Barbarians have produced, and always will produce barbarian religions; barbarians have produced and always will produce ideas in harmony with their surroundings, and all the religions of the past were produced by barbarians. We are making religions to-day. That is to say, we are changing them, and the religion of to-day is not the religion of one year ago. What changed it? Science has done it; education and the growing heart of man has done it. And just to the extent that we become civilized ourselves, will we improve the religion of our fathers. If the religion of one hundred years ago, compared with the religion of to-day is so low, what will it be in one thousand years?
Colonel Robert G. Ingersoll opens his lecture with a blunt declaration: the idea of hell was 'born of revenge and brutality on the one side, and cowardice on the other.' He immediately sets a confrontational tone, dismissing believers and preachers of eternal damnation as unworthy of respect. The text, drawn from his 'American Secular Lectures,' is structured as a persuasive speech rather than a theological treatise, using rhetorical questions, biblical quotations, and a memorable animal fable to undermine the doctrine's foundations.
The Human Origins of Religion
Ingersoll argues that all religions are human creations, asserting that 'every religion in this world is the work of man.' He points to the historical examination of Egyptian, Greek, and Roman faiths by Christian scholars, noting that the same methods used to debunk those ancient beliefs are now being turned against Christianity itself. His central claim is that human ideas come only from natural surroundings, not divine revelation. He illustrates this with a striking metaphor: no matter how fantastical a creature one imagines—'with the hoof of a bison, with the pouch of the kangaroo, with the wings of an eagle'—every element is borrowed from nature. This argument serves to strip hell of any supernatural authority, framing it as a purely human invention born of fear and cruelty.
The Fable of the Animals and the Shepherd
One of the most vivid passages in the lecture is a fable about animals deciding which of them killed a shepherd. A wolf pleads that shepherds have always been enemies of his family. A donkey confesses to stealing a mouthful of clover from a monastery yard, and the animals immediately shout 'He's the fellow!' and skin him. Ingersoll then delivers the punchline: 'That's the kind of people that go to hell.' The fable satirizes the injustice of a system where the most trivial offense is punished with extreme severity. It encapsulates his view that hell is a doctrine that punishes the innocent or the trivial while the truly guilty escape. The absurdity of the donkey's fate mirrors what Ingersoll sees as the absurdity of eternal damnation for finite sins.
Theological Contradictions and the Volcano Theory
Ingersoll quotes theologians who assert that God may damn anyone without diminishing his glory, and that the damned 'shall have nothing to do in passing away this eternity but to conflict with torments.' He seizes on the logical inconsistency of the devil persecuting his own recruits, asking, 'He wants all the recruits he can get; why then should he persecute his friends?' He also offers a materialist explanation for hell's origin: 'nobody would have had an idea of hell in this world if it hadn't been for volcanoes.' The idea of eternal fire, he claims, came from volcanic landscapes, not scripture. This section demonstrates his method of using both reason and mockery to dismantle the doctrine, treating it as a historical and psychological artifact rather than a divine truth.
Readers should note that this lecture is a rhetorical performance, not a systematic theology. Ingersoll's tone shifts between sarcasm, indignation, and logical argument. The excerpts show he relies heavily on quoted theological sources, which he then turns against their authors. The incomplete text leaves his full line of reasoning unclear, but the existing portions reveal a speaker who treats hell as a human cruelty to be abolished through reason and satire, not a mystery to be explored.
That lecture on eternal damnation stayed with me for days—not the fire, but how gently it made me see fear masquerading as love. It reminded me of something else I keep turning over lately, Shadowings — Text and Context, where the shadows aren't threats, just quiet edges of understanding. Both left me softer afterward, somehow nearer to kindness.
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